Noelia (noelia_g) wrote,
Noelia
noelia_g

This morning I informed my Mom about the legalisation of gay unions in UK.
Her reaction? "Will you be moving there now, then?"
Me: "Ha ha. But, good idea."
She shrugged. "Tea?"
"Yes, please."
Mom goes to the kitchen.
30 seconds passes.
Mom runs into the room. "You know you are *not* to mention this during Christmas Dinner with Grandparents?"

This add to the list of Things I'm Not Allowed To Mention To Grandpa.
Like, Homosexuality, Bisexuality, Feminism, Politics, both Polish and Foreign, TV, Internet, especially The Ammount Of Time I Spend Online, technology, My Ideas About My New Haircolour (also not to mention to Grandma, who doesn't like my idea of Illyria-Blue dye I plan to do soon), Food, Diet, Health, Medicine, Drugs (especially the fact that I Could Easily Get Any Drugs I Want Because That Just Means Knowing The Right People And I Know The Right People), Parties, Music, Literature and The Recent Event Of Some Girl Who Commited Suicide Because She Was Reading Manga (And As Grandpa Knows I Do Read Manga). I'm not allowed to mention the fact that it was because she was fucked in the head and not because she read manga, and not say again how I should commit suicide then, because I've read Madame Bovary lately. Under any circumstances I am not allowed to mention Sex, Veneral Diseases, Contraception methods and my ideas about Marriage, Relationships and Men in general. I am not allowed to talk about Religion, even if Grandpa starts.
When Grandpa asks me when I'm getting married, I'm not allowed to answer 'I'm free this Saturday if someone is offering' or 'I'm waiting till they make it legal in Poland'. If they ask about relationships, I'm not allowed to say 'Oh, you know Agnieszka, don't you?'.

Topics I'm allowed to talk about during Christmas Dinner with Grandparents are: my studies (unless it's the psychology and philosophy bit and as long as I don't talk about Old English), Weather and Our New House (but not my new room and not my ideas for decor.)

And yes, each member of my family has a list of things they should not mention, too.

If this Christmas don't end in blodshed I will be amazed.
Tags: family, random insanity
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